knowsthetruth I didn't ask for this, but here I am

[startfromnothing]

This place has too much space for him to be really comfortable. Too much money, too many clean angles, too much white. What else should he expect from someone that had grown up so well to fit into such a scenario? Siwoon wasn't the poor little lost lamb he'd been when they were kids. He had means now, and that meant he could have a setup like this.

And offer it to someone that he'd convinced in basically off the street.

Nevermind that their relationship is in something of an odd limbo. There is interest. It might even be completely mutual. But their circumstances aren't exactly normal, and Taemin still hasn't completely come to terms with the dramatic turn his life has taken; from a roof overhead that he didn't have to pay for to the ability to repay everything that he owed on his own terms, to finally having the company of someone that seemingly cared about his existence. That hadn't happened since the night his mother had run off without a word.

He's standing in the middle of the room he'd been given with his bag crammed full of just about everything he owned, spacing out as he considers all of it. His hand is gripped down tight around the strap of it, head up as he listens to the white noise of the apartment. He can barely here the city below from up here with the windows shut. It's surreal, for certain.

This was your choice, Yoon Taemin. You agreed to this. Whatever happens next,
you are responsible for that too.

Comments

[startfromnothing]

Maybe, in time, Taemin would be comfortable with Siwoon hanging onto him like he would when they were little. But this isn't a good time for it, and Taemin holds no embarrassment over shooing the other away as he steps into the kitchen.

"Go sit down. Don't hover, ok?" He points a spatula at Siwoon as he says it, before setting about making breakfast He moves fast but methodically, without a lot of finesse. Clearly, he's mastered making breakfast fast for when he has to dash out the door for work. This isn't a mad dash at least, just a quickly-prepared breakfast to hold them until they settle back into routine.

He hands over slices of omelet as soon as they're finished, arranged on a plate for easy picking. He'd gone with things out of Siwoon's refrigerator for filling, so he'd assume that everything in them was fine with him. So he's got slightly overstuffed omelette for breakfast, before either of them have to go and do much of anything.

"Coffee?" He's already starting a pot as he asks.

[knowsthetruth]

Siwoon doesn't question or attempt to argue the directions he's given. The space is easily big enough for the two of them, but he wants to see Taemin work. It's a means of learning more about him, little things that he's bound to gain with more time together. So he moves around the counter and takes a seat on a stool on the opposite side, keeping himself out of the way without removing himself so far that he can't see.

He's even quiet through the action, watching Taemin as if he's trying to learn everything himself. Siwoon doesn't speak up until he's handed a plate, a smile settling on his face as he moves to grab a fork.

"Mm, coffee would be good. Do you want anything else?" He's still up, holding the fork in hand as he motions toward a bowl of fruit near the refrigerator. "There are only bananas and apples in there now, but if you tell me what you prefer, I'll get that next time."

[startfromnothing]

He knows that Siwoon is watching him, and it makes him feel a little like he's under a microscope. But he's pretty sure it's not with any ill intentions at least. Whatever else Siwoon might be now, he knows he can at least trust the guy not to pull something awful without good reason.

At least talking lightens the atmosphere a bit, and he pours Siwoon a cup of coffee black,figuring that if he wanted anything in it, he could better know what he wanted than Taemin would.

"I'm good with this," he replies at the offer of fruit, picking up a piece of his eggs to pop into his mouth without waiting. He's used to eating just enough to get by, without the need for any sort of politeness when he wasn't out in public. Hopefully he'd be forgiven for the lack of decorum.

[knowsthetruth]

There's no chance Siwoon would pull anything awful. Not with Taemin. And considering he has no idea how long it might take to gain proper trust, he wouldn't even try anything remotely questionable. Such as moving to Taemin's side for the sake of kissing him. It's definitely something that crosses his mind while watching him cook, but Siwoon knows it's best left in his thoughts.

The lack of politeness doesn't bother him, but he does let a chuckle slip as he moves back to get a bite of eggs as well.

"You can sit down and take some time to eat, you know. Or are you running out of here the moment you're done?"

[startfromnothing]

Taemin isn't really a patient person. He rushes in, headstrong and acting before thinking, whatever the outcome might be.It's just in his nature, and his life up to now has reinforced that about him. So when Siwoon asks if he really has to rush out as soon as he's eaten, he opens his mouth to answer, then actually pauses. Does he have anything to do right this second?

No. Right now, his time is free. He can breathe.

"Nah...just too used to being in motion," he murmurs, slowing down a little and taking a smaller bite of his share of breakfast.

As he takes a seat beside Siwoon to actually take his time eating, he glances over, catching the look on the other's face. "What's funny?"

[knowsthetruth]

Taemin sits down and Siwoon almost wants to encourage him to relax, but he's not sure that's something that'll happen just yet. Not before he's adjusted to being in a new place. And maybe not even before he's finished paying off his debts. He seems to be wound tightly when it comes to money and Siwoon can only hope that'll abate once he's free from owing anyone anything.

He takes another bite, shrugging his shoulders as he looks over at Taemin.

"You're still the same, that's all. I think it's nice to see you haven't changed."

[startfromnothing]

"I figured out that I could survive doing things that way. And I did. I wouldn't say I've been thriving but I did everything on my own terms, everyone else be damned."

Taemin closes his eyes and sits back, head hanging back over the floor as his chair tips back. "When I get everything done I need to... Maybe I'll keep going to the gym. I'm good at the things they taught me. If they can keep paying me..." He stops when he catches himself musing aloud, shaking his head and letting the chair clatter back to the floor. He needs a shower before he heads out. "I'll be back tonight."

[knowsthetruth]

He already knows there's no chance Taemin will allow him to help, even just in taking care of him once he's finished paying things off. As much as he wants to, Siwoon knows he needs to take a step back and allow him that continued freedom of handling things on his own, even when it's not entirely necessary. Even when he has someone he can lean on now.

That's something he still has to earn back. So when Taemin stands, Siwoon remains seated, silently watching him as he finishes off his share of eggs. It keeps him from immediately reaching out, from reminding Taemin to take a breath. And when he finally does speak, it's with a nod.

"Alright. I'll see you when you get back."